Chris found the cooler full of different meats and vegetables. The vegetables were ripe and soft, but not spoiled. He didn’t want to make a bunch of noise by clanging pots or the sizzling sound of meat on the grill and run the risk of alerting the mob waiting for his exit. He located a microwave oven and fashioned a B.L.T. He had never cooked bacon in a microwave.
“Bacon’s very stretchy, but still wonderful!” He thought about his buddy Nolen; who hated pork. Chris savored the unclean beauty.
He didn’t know when he’d eat again so he decided to make a picnic basket. He nuked three more B.L.T.’s, stretched-wrapped them and tried stuffing them in his pants’ pockets.
“Dammit! Sarah was so crazy about my bubble butt that the pockets of these pants are too small.” He got frustrated trying to tuck his shirt in his pants with one hand. He tucked the pink polo in his underwear and dropped the sandwiches down the collar of his shirt.
Chris sat on floor, leaning against the cooler door and, in his terms, meditated, and decided, “Belly full; time to boogie.” Chris got up, walked through the dining area and budged the cafeteria door. He discovered that the dead-heads had pushed the sofa against the closed door and needed to find an alternate exit. He looked at the other side of the wall and saw a doubled-door handicapped doorway with a big blue button on the wall. Chris approached the button and gently pressed it. The motor engaged and “zeeEeeEEEeeEee*clunk*
He widely-scanned the open doorway and rounded the other side of the lobby, he saw all of the dead-heads gathered around the sofa and cafeteria door standing motionless.
Chris scanned the environs amongst the zombies and saw the downed Security Officer’s body. He spotted a big key ring on his duty belt between their legs. He wasn’t armed with a weapon like the other officer. He just had a shiny-leather belt with a flashlight, keys, handcuffs and what looks like a first-aid kit. “I can’t make it out.”
Chris felt like he did with the desperation for the pistol. But there was more strategy involved: 20-30 concentrated legs, the utmost importance of being quiet, greater probability of being dinner and one key to escape: priceless.
He thought to himself, “the utmost importance of being quiet.”
Chris started having an epiphany. “They’re activated by sound?!” He started remembering:
-“Ma’am? Can you help me?” Her head jerked straight up at the sound of his voice. She turned around and fixed her milked-over bloodshot eyes at him.
-An eruption in the ambient noise from the 3rd floor was noticed. “Errrrrrroooo…gaaaarrrrrrrrr” “Oh shit! They heard me!
-He started to slowly weave between them when his stomach grumbled again. The two people closest to him grunted loudly and locked eyes with Chris. The third person twitched like that guy from earlier. He had to get out of there now!
He felt empowered and reassured himself, “Holy Jeez! Silence is golden, huh?” He started analyzing what he just discovered. “Le-lemme get this straight. Noise wakes; or activates them? No, wonder they’re all standing around like statues.”
Chris regained focus on that key ring and headed for the Security Officer’s body. He scooted his sandwiches to his sides and went to the floor to go after the key; the key to his freedom.
He thought in his head, “That key has GOT to be on that ring!”
He started scooting across the floor. He was reminded of the wind-up army man that his dad talked about that buzzed across the floor with a rifle and frog legs. He closed in on the legs of a male zombie and got within four feet of the key ring. Chris got as close as he could to the calves of the zombie without touching him. He stretched his right arm out; leaning on his sore nub and his middle finger jingled the key ring. He could hear almost an electric jolt in the leg his ear was close to.
He shuddered in fright and started sweating because he was vulnerable now. He knew he was gonna be attacked and after all that effort and desperation for the gun; it would be in vain.
Chris quietly unsnapped the silver snaps with a gentle *tick* He saw a woman across from the Security Officer’s body rock her head from the right shoulder to the left shoulder. He got the keys and balanced the ring on his middle and ring fingers while simultaneously drawing his arm back. His eyes were trained on the swaying keys-maybe 25 keys. No matter which one, they all were the key to his freedom. He backed out of the zombie’s legs and sat on his butt. He scrolled through the keys looking for a label like, Front Door, Lobby Entrance, something that would get him out of there. He quietly rose to his feet and approached the boarded lobby doors.
He snuck each key into the lock one tumbler at a time.
*click*clickclick*click*tink* He twisted the key. “Nope.”
*tinkclink*tink* “Not this one.”
*tink*tick*POP*
The key turned. He felt the lock turning and he looked back at the crowd as he twisted the key.
*POP*
Their heads jerked and they all turned toward him in unison.
He pulled the key out, pushed the door open and flew around it to the outside pushing it shut. Scared to death he dropped the keys.
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